Book Review: Breaking Down by Maia Kinney-Petrucha & Stefan Petrucha

Review: Breaking Down
Series: Papercut Slices – Book 2
Author: Maia Kinney-Petrucha & Stefan Petrucha
No of Pages: 64
Release Date: 29 March 2011

Contained within the pages of this ghoulishly groovy graphic novel are the complete, unauthorized PARODIES of...nightlight, too soon, ellipses and breaking down.

Together these tales from the complete nightlight saga...the tragic, yet somewhat sparkly and movie-worthy, epic love story between Bleh-Bleh and Fredward. But unlike other silly love stories such as “Romeo and Juliet” that merely featured humans, this unforgettable, this seemingly never-ending yarn is complicated by the fact that Fredward just happens to be a...

No, not a rainbow rider...a vampire. Of course, things get even more complicated, and somewhat creepy, when Bleh-Bleh and Fredward meet J-Bob, a werewolf...

Can a flighty, fickle, female, a self-absorbed blood-sucker and a hapless, hirsute hunk find true happiness together? Or is that a stupid question?

My Thoughts:

Breaking Down was a quick, entertaining if slightly odd parody.

Breaking Down is narrated by Bleh-Bleh’s father Duck. He gives us an update on what’s been happening over the last few years and we get to see in pictures how the story unfolds.

Bleh-Bleh is quite true to her Twilight counterpart, being exceptionally dull and dim-witted. It is emphasised here in her addiction of sticking her tongue in light-sockets “for a buzz”.

Fredward and J-Bob have equal panel time to Bleh-Bleh in this parody and it is made quite obvious who the authors think Bella should have ended up with.

We also get a cast of evil child stars (including appearances by the Rugrats, Stewie and Chuckie), super-heroes and quite well drawn renditions of the Volturi.

What kept me entertained about Breaking Down was that all of the questionable things from the Twilight Saga were brought up and emphasized, including but not limited to: Jacob’s imprinting on a child, Bella’s ability to chose the cold, dead, scrawny guy over the hot, live, nice guy, and Bella’s inability to realise that Edward was a dangerous killer.


Breaking Down was odd, it was not what I am looking for in a parody, when I think parodies I think Disc World series, a parody of life but not outrageously so, there is still a story in front of the comedy. This was an obvious jab at all the atrocities of Twilight, it was a weekend comic put together by Petrucha and his daughter and it was funny, it was light and it was quick.

I have still yet to find a parody that I enjoy without thinking “well, that’s just stupid and obvious”, but Breaking Down was an entertaining read for those of us that have read the Twilight series and who will be able to pick up on the major jokes but also a lot of the subtle and well hidden ones.

Breaking Down was a light, funny and playful approach to the Twilight saga.

Also in this series:
Harry Potty and the Deathly Boring

My Two Cents: The Twilight Haze

The review for The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner went up yesterday and guess what...it made me want to re-read Twilight.

This is due to the effects of "The Twilight Haze".

The Twilight Haze is the state in which logical people fall into when they read the Twilight Saga. We know it's not plausible, we know it's not possible and we know it's downright stupid at times, but that doesn't stop us from being sucked in whilst reading Twilight.

When away from Twilight and its haze, I can fully see how stupid Bella is and how controlling Edward is, but watching the movie, reading the books or spin-offs I fall back into that trance that blocks all logical thought and get caught up in the story once again.

In a way, although it's really bad writing...it's also brilliant. How can something so bad be so good?

It's like Maccas really, you know you're killing yourself with every bite of burger, but you really don't care at the time. There is no special taste or nutritional benefit from eating Maccas and it is inevitable that you will feel regret and possibly nausea after eating it...but when you are eating, nothing else in the world matters.

Same goes for Twilight. It is a reused story line with a crazy stalkerish spin put on it, there is no nutrition because it melts your brains and leads you to believe that controlling boyfriends are ok. There is no English value because of the writing style and the obvious absence of a Thesaurus at the time of writing, but you just can't help it.

I know that after I read it I will be wondering why...but for now...there might be an upcoming plunge back into Forks, Washington.

Book Review: The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner by Stephenie Meyer

Review: The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner
Series: Twilight Saga – Novella
Author: Stephenie Meyer
No of Pages: 178
Release Date: 5 June 2010

Fans of The Twilight Saga will be enthralled by this riveting story of Bree Tanner, a character first introduced in Eclipse, and the darker side of the newborn vampire world she inhabits.

Bree Tanner can barely remember life before she had uncannily powerful senses, superhuman reflexes and unstoppable physical strength. Life before she had a relentless thirst for blood... life before she became a vampire.

All Bree knows is that living with her fellow newborns has few certainties and even fewer rules: watch your back, don't draw attention to yourself and, above all, make it home by sunrise or die. What she doesn't know: her time as an immortal is quickly running out.

Then Bree finds an unexpected friend in Diego, a newborn just as curious as Bree about their mysterious creator, whom they know only as "her". As they come to realize that the newborns are pawns in a game larger than anything they could have imagined, Bree and Diego must choose sides and decide whom to trust. But when everything you know about vampires is based on a lie, how do you find the truth?

In another irresistible combination of danger, mystery, and romance, Stephenie Meyer tells the devastating story of Bree and the newborn army as they prepare to close in on Bella Swan and the Cullen’s, following their encounter to its unforgettable conclusion.

My Thoughts:

Seeing through the eyes of someone other than Bella was definitely refreshing, but there were still traces of complete and utter stupidity on a woman’s part.

Bree Tanner as we all know dies in Eclipse. This book follows her second life of vampirism before her demise. Bree as a character is quite interesting. She was a runaway before she became a vampire so already had some survival techniques. When she became a vampire she quickly learned to stay out of the way if she wanted to live. She learns to keep a low profile behind Freaky Fred who has some sort of special power making it hard to look at him.

Bree lives in a large nest of very young, very violent vampires. Their leader Riley doesn’t have much control over them, only by way of scare tactics. They believe they are true vampires, burning in the sun, can’t go into holy places type vampires. On a late night hunt with her group Bree and one other know they won’t make it back in time for sun up, so they hide in a cave.

Bree and Diego get talking about their new lives and soon discover that they aren’t as vulnerable as first thought. After an accidental brush with the sun Bree and Diego start questioning if Riley knew all along that it didn’t affect them, and if he did, what else was he lying about.

After some detective work they realise they are part of an army going to take down “the yellow-eyes” a nasty, dangerous coven who keeps a pet human. It becomes a game of whoever kills the human wins.

Bree for being a smart and likeable character seems to have a dramatic change in her intelligence in the final pages of the story. Instead of thinking logically about why Diego has gone missing after talking to Riley, she heads off into battle to save him. A boy. She met four days ago and has had two conversations with. Sound familiar?

After an awesome beginning we fell back into the same old world of Twilight in which a girl who has just met someone who is potentially dangerous, risks her life to save him because she doesn’t want to live without him.

Uh-huh.

Lovely start, cop-out for an ending, but definitely a likable character. Anyone who has read Twilight will want to read this as it shines a normal light onto the world of vampires, well, as normal as you get where Glitter Pixies are concerned.

Book Review: Twilight: The Graphic Novel - Volume 1 by Stephanie Meyer; Illustrated by Young Kim

Review: Twilight: The Graphic Novel – Volume 1
Series: Twilight Graphic Novel – Volume 1
Author: Stephanie Meyer, Illustrated by Young Kim
No of Pages: 224
Release Date: 16 March 2010

I’ve never given much thought to how I would die – though I’d had reason to in the last few months...
Surely it was a good way to die...in the place of someone else, someone I love.

When Isabella Swan moves to the gloomy town of Forks and meets the mysterious, alluring Edward Cullen, her life takes a thrilling and terrifying turn. With his porcelain skin, golden eyes, mesmerizing voice, and supernatural gifts, Edward is both irresistible and impenetrable. Up until now, he has managed to keep his true identity hidden, but Bella is determined to uncover his dark secret...

My Thoughts:

Ah, the world of Twilight, now in pictures. I will make no secret of the fact that I too am affected by the Twilight Haze and going back into that world once again is just as enchanting in pictures as it was in words.
Yes, the vampires are all wrong, yes Bella is annoyingly boring and Edward is a controlling, stalking weirdo but you just can’t help yourself.

I read this every morning before work for a week until I was done, and I will admit that I was slightly late a few mornings.

Now, Twilight is my first ever graphic novel so I don’t know if this is standard, but if I hadn’t read the book, I wouldn’t have had a clue about what was going on. Even having read it, I was still confused at times.

You really can’t get the same detail through pictures as you can words. So for those thinking of reading it, definitely read Twilight (I can’t believe I just said that) before you read this.

Twilight Trailer: Eclipse 30/6/2010

I wasn't going to be part of this, but I couldn't help myself....i had to share it:

OMG I'm sooo excited!!!! Eclipse was my favourite book out of the series!!!!

Book Review: Nightlight: A Parody by The Harvard Lampoon

Review: Nightlight: A Parody

Author: The Harvard Lampoon

No. Of Pages: 154

Release Date: 11 March 2009

About three things I was absolutely certain.

First, Edwart was most likely my soul mate, maybe.

Second, there was a vampire part of him – which I assumed was wildly out of his control – that wanted me dead.

And third, I unconditionally, irrevocably, impenetrably, heterogeneously, gynecologically, and disreputably wished he had kissed me.

And thus Belle Goose falls in love with the mysterious and sparkly Edwart Mullen in the Harvard Lampoon’s hilarious send-up.

Pale and klutzy, Belle arrives in Switchblade, Oregon, looking for adventure, or at least and undead classmate. She soon discovers Edwart, a super-hot computer nerd with zero interest in girls. After witnessing a number of strange events – Edwart leaves his chips untouched at lunch! Edwart saves her from a flying snowball! – Belle has a dramatic revelation: Edwart is a vampire. But how can she convince Edwart to bite her and transform her into his eternal bride, especially when he seems to find girls so repulsive?

Complete with romance, danger, insufficient parental guardianship, creepy stalkerlike behaviour, and a vampire prom, Nightlight is the uproarious tale of a vampire-obsessed girl, looking for love in all the wrong places.

My Thoughts:

Teaser Tuesdays - 19/1/2010

Currently Reading: Nightlight: A Parody - The Harvard Lampoon

"Then I decided to really fight. I jumped up to kick Josh in the butt. I got kind of embarrased mid-kick though, so it ended up being more of a timid toe-tap. His butt cheeks juggled, unscathed, sending me backwards into the empty grave he had come out of."

Teaser Tuesday is the brain-child of Should be Reading